Written and published by X
I know what some of you are thinking, and no I’m not saying woman can’t prosper in this world, of course woman have the ability to succeed. But, in the music/nightclub industry? That answer is complicated. We absolutely can, but sometimes it can be pretty hard to do so. You have to be really lucky not to run into assholes who take advantage of their power. Luckily, I’ve been working with some really great guys who respect me and who I consider to be good friends of mine, but I have run into a couple of bad guys.
I had a huge opportunity that involved me dancing on stage and touring around with an upcoming artist. His manager reached out to me and I was so excited that I started telling all my friends and social media. Huge mistake… Take my advice when I say wait to tell people about your success until you have full certainty that you have the opportunity. In my defense, this guy seemed so serious that he was basically going to lead me to stardom. We had talked for a while and I had even told him about times where men had been disrespectful towards me while waving an opportunity in front of my face, and that I was grateful he wasn’t doing that. I guess I set that bar too high. I mentioned that I had a boyfriend and he mentioned he had a girlfriend, so I assumed that we had set boundaries and there was no chance he would try to flirt with me. Wrong. Wrong. Wrong. It was very weird. I’m still weirded out by it, and yes, I had to block him. I will never understand why some people can’t stick to business, but hey, I guess there was nothing in it for him. This was one time out of many that someone has done something like this.
Am I going to spend this entire article complaining? No of course not, I’m going to give you tips on how to be a successful woman in this industry. First things first, credibility. Make sure people know that you mean business. Know your worth and don’t settle for less. Your credibility is everything, because when people know who you are, they know not to mess with you. A good way to do this is to network. Networking confidently might push you outside of your comfort zone, but it’ll take you far. Second thing you should know is to stop giving people so much power to the point where they take advantage of you. I know, sounds easier than it actually is. Don’t be rude, but stop being so nice. You don’t need to act friendly to do business with someone, just act professional, and once you feel you can trust them, then let them know that you’re a genuine friend. That’s the third tip. Be genuine. Don’t take advantage of others just because you feel like you’ve been taken advantage of. If someone is being disrespectful, simply let it go. There’s no position out there big enough to settle for constant disrespect. I know you want this job, I know you want to be taken seriously, I know you want the fame or the money, but some things are just not worth it. Trust me.
To the men who don’t behave like this in the industry; I just wanted to emphasize my “thank you”, even though it is the bare minimum. You're all kings and you deserve to be up top. Every man I know who’s been respectful in the industry has gotten extremely far with life, and the rest of them? I haven’t heard their names in a while. I feel like this needed to be talked about, because I know so many people who have experienced the same things as I have. Let it be known that I won’t stand for it any longer, and neither should you. -X